Why do we worry???
Ok, God tells us not to worry, right? So why do we???
I have asked myself this question so many times in the past few months. As many of you know God just took Eddie and I through the biggest test of faith in our lives…..we cried, we prayed, we trusted…somehow God gave us that trust in Him that gave us such a peace to walk the journey of brain surgey…so if somehow we can go through brain surgery with trust in God, why can’t we do that in every situation?
Today I was in a situation that was pretty tough for me…I won’t go in to a lot of detail, but let’s just say that it’s a situation that I’ve put into God’s hands countless times and I’ve taken it right back every time. Does anyone else ever do that? Then I find myself worrying about what’s ahead regarding this specific situation, and so many times I completely ignore the fact that I have an incredible Father who wants to give me peace and trust, but I’m too focused on worrying about the situation that I forget all about Him and try to figure it out myself.
So I came home today and put the kids down for their nap and got out a study I’ve been doing of Beth Moore’s. It was about David during the time he was running from Saul…..David was running for his life, leaving his new wife, his best friend, everything….in Psalm 142 we see David crying out to God about his situation….David was really hurting and God was right there to hear David’s cry and give him the comfort and peace that David needed……reading that chapter made me wonder why do I turn to so many other things before going straight to God with my hurts and my frustrations? Today I first tried to figure the situtaion out in my mind….when that didn’t work I called a couple people for a pep talk….still feeling discouarged I finally decided to pray about it. That did it…prayer has a way of bringing us into God’s presence, which is completely transforming!!!
I feel ashamed of the way I’ve handled myself in this whole situation….what kind of example am I being to those involved that don’t know Christ? Do they see much difference in me? Probably not, at least not lately. So…once again I have put this into His hands, and this time I’m praying that God will help me keep it in His hands! God knows absolute best in all areas…I need to trust Him with this situation and leave it on His shoulders….He wants to carry my burdens….He knows how tough this has been for me, and He wants to help me through it…..it’s time I let Him!
Lord….I’m sorry that I represent you so poorly at times….thank you for never giving up on me…..may I put all things into your big, capable hands and trust you with the outcome. No matter what happens you know best….thanks for always being there for me Jesus….I love you so much and am so thankful that you continue to open my eyes to see as you see…..
August 28th, 2008 at 11:09 am
You sound so like me Martha Marie. But my wonderful mentor, Ivan Crissman, also said that we each struggle each day. For me, I know I want to do EVERYTHING in his will but I have found out and still struggle with knowing that when I try to do it, I will fell. But the thing is Martha Marie, it is so nice to hear someone else struggle ( no fun intended here) because it shows others that are struggling (that may think you know God better than they do) that it is ok to struggle but in the end we can show them where the true strength comes from. Because if we go around trying to be the perfect Child of God (which we can’t be), why would some one that does not know him possible want to come to know him. Because they know in themselves they are not perfect. Does this make sense to anyone but me????
I am so proud to know Eddie and you, because I for one thought how spiritual they are but now I know you are just as human as I that need a savior just like me. We all have faith, yes some closer to God than others but we will always struggle till we really get to see him face to face. Love ya girl.
Donna
Humbly TRYING to serve him
August 29th, 2008 at 2:27 am
Thank you, Martha Marie, for being so open and honest. We needed to read your words today. We have asked ourselves the same question, with all that God has brought us through…how could we even question. Thanks!